Home About 30 Before 30 Blogroll Contact Disclosure

Friday, February 4, 2011

The Time I Cried in the Shower...

(Originally written November 16, 2010)



I'm a crier. I cry at weddings; I cry each time I get angry, and I cry every time I watch that scene from Lion King where Mufasa gets thrown off a cliff and is run over by the stampede of wildebeast (Poor Simba).


Sometimes, when I'm asked to sing at funerals (and sometimes during a mass), I have to keep my voice from cracking because I get so emotionally invested in the song that I feel the need to cry. It's a curse -- this inability to suppress my tears. In hindsight, I laugh at myself for crying over the silliest things, but I just can't help it sometimes.


Take the other day, for example.


I was taking a shower, and decided to sing a song to help me kill time. Plus, we all know acoustics in the bathroom are the best and can make us all believe we're American Idol worthy.


I was about 7 weeks pregnant at the time and really excited about the prospect of becoming a new mama.


The song that popped in my head was, "From This Moment", by Shania Twain.


I've sung this song maybe 200 times in my life, whether it be at a wedding gig or just for fun. It has a beautiful melody and I memorize the lyrics by heart.


But - OMG - I couldn't even get through the first two lines before I started bawling my eyes out in the shower!!! It's supposed to be a song about a two people getting married, but in a different context, it can also be a song about a mother and a baby.


I was clutching my belling, with tears pouring out of my eyes, attempting my hardest to finish the song, while the shower continued to pound at my back. I'm sure it looked like a scene straight from a movie.

Every line touched my heart and I realized that this song was written for me and my unborn child (as cheesy as that might sound).

I still can't sing that song without choking up after the first few lines -- ask Matthew. I tried to sing it to him, but ended up hyperventilating after a few seconds.


Below are the lyrics, and just imagine as if it were being sung by a mother to her child. Beautiful, right?


From This Moment


From this moment life has begun
From this moment you are the one
Right beside you is where I belong
From this moment on



From this moment I have been blessed
I live only for your happiness
And for your love I'd give my last breath
From this moment on



I give my hand to you with all my heart
Can't wait to live my life with you, can't wait to start
You and I will never be apart
My dreams came true because of you


From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment on


You're the reason I believe in love
And you're the answer to my prayers from up above
All we need is just the two of us
My dreams came true because of you


From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment
I will love you as long as I live
From this moment on
----

See... I'm crying again. Oh, pregnancy hormones!!!!